It was a very good sear...

As a haole in Hawai'i I am on a constant quest to maintain that coveted golden glow. One may think that only vacationers from the mainland are truly interested in bringing home the Maui Brown, but look at it from my perspect: I am home, which means I gotta bring the brown every day. Tanning is a chore, but it doesn't have to feel that way. I like to combine the task, making otherwise fruitless daily activities more rewarding.  For example,

(Pretending to) garden...
I like to water my plants (sometimes) shirtless (always).

Walking the dog...
I took care of a dog for 4 months and walked her everyday, shamelessly shirtless. Two birds, one tan.

Exercising...
What's the difference between running outside and working out at the gym? Outdoor runs are for accomplishing your task during peak tanning hours, gymming is for admiring your tan at night. That's why there's mirrors at 24. 

Driving...
Sorry, you're looking at a trucker's tan if you don't do it shirtless.  But please be respectful and put your shirt back on before you enter Foodland. Just because "No Shoes, No Shirt" isn't strictly enforced here, doesn't make it a best practice.

Days of rays at Kaimana Beach, just east of Waikiki.

The hue of your target tan depends, of course, on your natural hue. I generally aim for somewhere within the spectrum between tangerine dream and weathered leather.  Whatever your goal, always use protection. My go to screen is Banana Boat Green Tea SPF 8.  If you are of milkier descent, you may want to start with 70.  Once protected I'll add a coat of Maui Browning lotion. It contains coffee extract and potassium iodide, leaving just a hint of that purpley hue every deep tan deserves.

So where's the best place to get it done in town? I like to check-in at Kaimana Beach, on the diamond head side of Waikiki. There's plenty parking (metered and not) at the adjacent Kapionlani Park, and it's a lot wider from shorebreak to tree line than most of the other parts of Waikiki. Plus, if you hit the beach at the right time in the late afternoon, skip the shade of the palms and claim your spot beneath the large windows of the New Otani Hotel, which act as a magnifying glass providing bonus rays for only the most discerning tanners.

Twas a very good sear. 

Almost Doesn't Count - Hungover Hiking @ Koko Head

OUT IN WAIKIKI is back after a several month hiatus during which the editors spent some time being distracted by their own rediculous lives.  Now we're back with a New Year, New You posting.  Given we're knee deep in 2011 already, it's more of a Chinese New Year, New You.

I just returned to Honolulu after a jet-setting 2 day, 3 night weekend in Portland, visiting the family and friends that I unfortunately missed while working in Waikiki over Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Much merriment commenced, mainly drinking and karaoke and filling my suitcase with all parts of H&M (can someone please get on that, Waikiki and Ala Moana are aching for this Forever21 rival to pop up!)

After barely sleeping on the plane, let alone the night before the early morning flight, I said "you know what? No rest for the weary...Happy New Year, Koko Head."  Just about 30 min east of the city is Koko Head District Park, where hungover souls can dehydrate themselves in a punishable fashion with a 0.8 mile, nearly vertical climb to the top of the crater.  This was my second summit, iPod shuffle in hand, I could never quite land on the Brandy song needed to inspire the hike.  Still yet, I told myself after several pauses "almost doesn't count." 

21 minutes later I was at the top, sweating till I couldn't sweat no more, enjoying the panoramic views of Hanauma bay, Diamondhead and Waikiki, Hawaii Kai, and the stretch of coast from Sandy's to Makapu'u.  I hated every minute of the hike, but it hurts so good when you finish.

It's nice to berate your body into physical submission after too much drinking and too much time away from the gym.  Lemme show you who's the boss now...  It's also nice to get out of Waikiki sometimes.



FML.



CPK? Uh, we have one of those...

Last Thursday was my birthday, and I spent the day at work.  That was just fine with me, since my party wasn’t until the next night.  Still yet, I couldn’t just ignore the day my momma gave me, so after I finished my shift at 9pm I met Lia at one of my favorite hole-in-the-wall restaurants in Waikiki: California Pizza Kitchen. 

A taste of the mainland, in the center of Waikiki.

Of course I’m being facetious - CPK is a national chain, and if you live in a major metropolitan area , or a major suburb with a mall, you’ve probably encountered one.  That may be why when I recommend CPK as one of many dining options to inquiring visitors, some respond “ Uh, we have one of those…sooo.”  

Sooo… E Komo Mai, welcome to Waikiki.  A major metropolis with a trolley that runs every 5 minutes to Ala Moana Shopping Center.  Unfortunately the area’s lacking in the category of inexpensive, sit-down, indigenous restaurants that you were expecting to be within walking distance of your hotel.   So, you can eat at the CPK down the block, or the one at the mall. 

I digress and I rant, but it’s hard out here for a concierge sometimes when the closest option for “authentic” Hawaiian fare is Kenny’s at the Royal Hawaiian food court.  Again, some guests just aren’t lookin’ to crawl the mall for every meal.

Endless iced tea... bottoms up! 

Anyways, back to my birthday bolognese at CPK.  I got just that, and a bottomless mango iced tea.  I always order the spaghetti Bolognese here, because I can always count on it tasting good and hitting the spot (not too sweet… a lot of red sauces can have a cavity-quality to them, but this one doesn’t go that route).  It was an especially appropriate choice, since every year for my birthday my mom used to cook spaghetti for me.  Nothing beats the homemade, but it was the best I could do without Ma’dear.

Our server for the evening was Rachelle, just the sweetest thing.  All bubbly and genuine and friendly smiles.  In an attempt to embarrass me, Lia mentioned that it was my birthday, and Rachelle happily brought us an ice cream sundae with a candle, and led the b’day serenade.  Also, in accordance with family tradition, Lia took a photo of me faux-blowing the candle out, since the camera missed the real blow.

A faux blow for the camera...

Other perks about the Waikiki CPK include a warm atmosphere, with the option of indoor, bar, or outdoor seating.  It takes a bit longer to get a seat outside during peak dinner hours, but it’s worth it.  The 2nd floor lanai in the heart of Waikiki is great people watching, and I was a little too excited about the opportunity to capture the Newspaper Man on camera without having to pay! Haha, Lia was not impressed.

HA!  This just in... I'm amused.

Finally, they offer kamaaina discount of 20% if you show your Hawaii ID or local bank card.

DOA ?:  That could be interesting, but it’s just dinner, so you can probably wait.

HAUNT OR EXORCISE?:  Haunt it like a mall rat haunts Jamba.  Or like I haunt Cinnabon (now that’s one mall chain that Waikiki is really missing out on!)

CALIFORNIA PIZZA KITCHEN
2284 Kalakaua Avenue (Center of Waikiki Bulding, 2nd Floor (above Foot Locker))
Honolulu, HI 96815

out for labor day: A PHOTO ESSAY

---

M:  I thought this was a theme party, I was going for biker-chic.

L:  uhhh...

L:  ...looks like S&M's the trend.  I'm suprised they let you in.

M:  Me too. Let's check out the dance floor.

M:  There's bears in here.

L:  Yeah there are.

M:  Hey, some seats opened up at the bar...

M:  Hi Talon!  (...Miller Time tik tok...)  Check Please!

L:  I'm sober, let's go.

M:  Anything for you, Snooks.  Goodnight bar.  Goodnight bears.  Goodnight moon.

---

EAT, PRÆ, LOVE

Friday night I headed to Nobu, the sleek Japanese restaurant and lounge in the Waikiki Parc Hotel, for the launch of the PRÆ party. The title of this post is almost completely irrelevant to my review, as I didn’t eat anything at Nobu, and while I enjoyed myself, I wouldn’t say I loved the party. Frankly I just wanted to reference the best-seller-turned-feature film that got Julia Roberts and countless choosy moms exploring Hinduism. Surprising as it may seem, it’s not uncommon - many others felt similarly inspired to explore Catholicism after “Doubt,” or Helen Hunt after “Pay It Forward.”

My friend and I walked through a tunnel of blue light to get to the lobby of the Waikiki Parc, so modern and chic. We entered the restaurant and I spotted my beautiful female friend Coco. Sauntering by the bar, Coco’s all legs and the most fashionable lady in red-lips gracing the room.

I'll have what she's having...

I kissed her on the cheek, exchanged pleasantries, and took a sip of her jet-lag inspired cocktail: crown and ginger ale. I then started my own tab at the bar, ordering the special of the night, $7 kettle one & whatever. The friend I came with got a watermelon martini - made with care and garnished with melon, rind and all. No seeds, though. Later we all enjoyed a tasting of pina-martinis, fruity and sweet it was like a spiked, melted shave ice.

The atmosphere was warm and the DJ was spinning a hypnotic mix of trance beats, an appropriate soundtrack for the night. The reason why I wasn’t loving it, however, was because this lounge was a little too small for such a large party. The place was packed, standing room only by 10:30pm. The crowd was taking away from the fashionable feel, and the room was dotted by a few too many surf tees. I’m not one to comment on dress code, but Coco must have felt violated by the indiscretion.

Full Bar!  A promoter's prayers answered

We eventually snagged a table and a friend ordered bubbly-bottle service. Champagne appeared to be the classy carbonated alternative to beer all around the room that night. Later I spotted someone across from us looking all like a “white Fantasia Barino,” to which Coco replied “didn’t she try to kill herself?” Is nothing sacred? The rumor mill just won’t quit; even at Nobu, our former American Idol can’t catch a break. She has a new album out.

We spent the rest of the night discussing things like a recent spread featuring models holding handbags and dressed as bears, and what to wear to the aloha bears party at Hula’s. TBD.


DOA? : No need. The champagne will go straight to your head.


HAUNT OR EXORCISE? : I’ll haunt Nobu another night. Plus, I really want to eat there sometime. I’ve been told I’ll love it.


NOBU WAIKIKI
2233 Helumoa Road (Waikiki Parc Hotel, lobby level)
Honolulu, HI 96815

UP IN FLAMES @ RumFire

This past Sunday I decided to check out the scene at RumFire, a sleek oceanfront bar and lounge at the Sheraton Waikiki. Every last Sunday from 7-11pm the venue plays host to a homo-centric dance party. Just moments after I walked in, a kind soul bought me a drink, earning the scene some early points.

I had gone to the outdoor cash-only bar overlooking the pool deck, and the bartender was so apologetic that she had run out of the night’s $5 special - skyy vanilla- and insisted on mixing any other drink for the same price. At any rate, I hadn’t had vanilla vodka since early college, and I wasn’t looking to revisit that unfortunate flavor of hangover. So I let the lovely bartender choose a drink for me. She insisted on a Bacardi Melon with Sprite. Hmm, it tasted like cavities, but I figured I shouldn’t go to Rum Fire without touching the rum.

The Fire Wall

While many guests lounged inside RumFire by the light of the illuminated bar, glowing orange from ceiling to floor, others were scattered about the outdoor tables, lit and warmed by torches and caldrons of fire. The dancing was outside too, with the DJ and sound system set-up on this first terrace of the pool deck. Sweet tea in hand I headed toward the small mass of people on the dance floor to meet a friend. In the midst of the dancing I also met the evening’s birthday boy, adorned with leis and moving to the rhythm of PCD’s “Buttons” ft. Snoop Dogg. I got in on the action when the beat dropped on “New York.” I did the Jay-Z part of that once at Wang’s (probably woulda been better off doing any of Nicole’s parts in “Buttons”).

concrete jungle where dreams are made of...

I had met a fun group dancing - the birthday entourage - including the event’s promoter Kevin, who apparently makes sure the party’s crackin’ at RumFire on a monthly basis. The DJ packed up around 11pm, and after consulting with the man of the hour on his B’day wishes, it was on to the next one…

DOA? : Drunk on arrival? I was.


HAUNT OR EXORCISE? : The outdoor dance party, the hospitable staff, and the warm ambience makes RumFire a hauntable hot spot.

RUMFIRE
2255 Kalakaua Ave (Lobby level of the Sheraton Waikiki)
Honolulu, HI 96815

Lettin' it all WANG OUT!

This past Saturday I was lucky enough to make it to the last Kon Tiki party of the season at Wang Chung's, a beach-themed night of revelry at the Asian karaoke bar.  We arrived around ten and the hole in the wall bar was packed, standing room only (which is typical at Wang's for this time on a Saturday).  Two military boys were cordial enough to give up a seat to my roomie Lia.  Their chivalry had its limits, as they then asked, rather nicely nonetheless, if they could motor-boat her.  Not tonight, boys.  Later they bought me a shot so I could catch up with them, but the effort was in vain as they were already three sheets to the wind.

To the wind I say! Thanks boys!

At any rate, I was able to get in a few standards - even with the crowd it was only about a 15-20 minute wait to get your song up.  Wang Chung's has one of the best selections of quality songs I've seen, plus a binder of "new songs" that's continually updated with new karaoke classics, from Keri Hilson to Ke$ha (still waiting to hear someone whisper "I like your beard" into the mic), to Young Money's "Bedrock," my personal favorite.

Wang's is definitely an intimate atmosphere, both because of the size of the venue and the friendly faces that work behind the bar.  Dan greets his guests by name and with a hug, and bartender Bud pours a pint of Hef  with lemon when he sees me walk in the door.  They only have two beers on tap, but one of them is Widmer Hefeweizen, and that’s all I could really ask for. The other is Sapporo.

Meanwhile, Cory whips up one of the best local kine cocktails in Waikiki, the lychee kamikaze. The mix of chilled lychee-infused vodka and lime makes for a refreshing melon taste in the end. Cory played bartender and host at the Kon Tiki party, and even managed to sing a ditty or two from behind the counter. Cory’s sister made it a family affair and brought it home with a par-for-the-course rendition of “Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend,” sounding all expensive and shit like a young Marilyn Monroe.

Good songs, good drinks, good people. Wang’s is good to me, and she’ll be good to you too.

A typical night out Wangin’

DOA: I usually prime with a beer before I go, and let the Hef take it from there.


HAUNT OR EXORCISE: Haunt this bitch. I do.

 
WANG CHUNG’S ASIAN KARAOKE BAR
2410 Koa Avenue (Behind the Hyatt Regency)
Honolulu, HI 96815